Have you ever walked into a home – not for an event, but a random visit to someone’s house – and found it spotless, well scented, and beyond immaculate? It could be the most modest home, but somehow the cleanliness of it made you automatically know it’d pass the white-glove test.
Have you ever walked into a home – not for an event, but a random visit to someone’s house – and found it spotless, well scented, and beyond immaculate? It could be the most modest home, but somehow the cleanliness of it made you automatically know it’d pass the white-glove test.
Now, how’d it make you feel? Cozy? Warm? Welcomed? Like you were at home?
I know for me, that’s never been the case. I like cleanliness, but a squeaky-clean environment makes me feel uncomfortable. If I find my space like that, I most certainly won’t stay a while.
Furniture choice can do the same thing. One aunt of mine had a new couch set every year, it seemed. I learned later she was keeping up with the trends. The only problem was, we weren’t allowed to lounge on it, which didn’t matter. It was too “unbroken” every time that we never felt like truly resting on it.
That reminds me of when I shopped for my very first couch. I tested one out, but it was too firm – not one I could kick my feet up on. The agent showing me around said she sold this same set to a business owner. When he walked in, he said, “I want a couch that is comfortable but not too comfortable.” When the agent asked why, he replied, “It’s for my office. I want clients to feel welcomed, but not so rested that they aren’t attentive, decide quickly, then leave.”
That’s the exact vibe I get when I visit a sparkling home.
What Makes a Home Welcoming?
To me, it’s got some charm. It doesn’t have to be unclean, that’s just as uncomfortable as it is too clean. It does have to have a splash of personality, though.
I love homes that have a personal touch to them and aren’t all picturesque, like from a home décor magazine. Take my spa for example, they have a clean and Parisian aesthetic, but it feels warm. They keep flameless candles lit. They have refreshments on the front table. Their “Specials Menu” is just a laminated piece of paper with cheesy artwork. The rooms smell like vanilla and coconut. Each massage room has a water fountain and amber lighting. The hard and polished floors have thick area rugs. The music playing is soft, but uplifting.
Obviously, a spa is supposed to be clean and hygienic. But it’s that extra personal touch they add to make me feel ready to relax and at home.
Now take my doctor’s office. There’s a cold soft-cushioned lounge chair with a piece of butcher paper on it. It’s hygienic with a biohazard waste bin. Every medical supply is neatly wrapped or kept in a clear sterile glass jar, labeled “sterile”. There’s plenty of seating for me and a caregiver, as well as my doctor. The blood pressure machine and stethoscope are organized in place on the wall.
Do you see my point? They are both healing centers, but only one makes me feel welcomed and ready to let go. The other makes me feel cold and vulnerable, like I’m waiting for instructions and can never relax.
Why? Because doctors want us to walk out so the next patient can come in quickly. They make more money this way. At the spa, they’re banking on your long-stay and want you to utilize all their services. It has to be warm and cozy.
What Kind of Host(ess) Are You?
If you’re opening your home for the holidays, how homey is your space? Do you have a fire going? Something baking in the oven? Do you keep a candle lit in the bathroom? How do you set the ambience? Can people kick off their shoes? Do guests feel so comfortable, they sit on the floor to open Christmas gifts?
If your home is sterile and your intention is to keep guests around, then you’ve got it mixed up. Add a few throw blankets to your couch. Play some popular music that everyone can enjoy. Have some comforting down-to-earth foods available, like a casserole of mac-and-cheese. Bake some old-fashioned chocolate chip cookies. Have a sports game on T.V.
You don’t have to keep your dog hair around. You don’t have to leave a heaping pile of laundry on your sofa. You don’t have to leave all the crumbs and dirt on your floors. Clean your home, but be okay with the following:
- some dishes in the sink
- a little toothpaste left in the bathroom sink
- slippers on the living room floor
- a coffee mug on a coffee table, how appropriate
Let’s Stop Caring So Much About What People Think
Of course, if you were hosting an event, you’d clean your home and add splashes of warmth. That’s not what we’re talking about here. If someone you know called to say they wanted to stop by for a quick visit, are you going to get busy scrubbing at your home? Wiping your moldings? Dusting your ceiling fans?
Cut yourself some slack. Who cares if someone sees your cat’s toy rat in the corner of the hallway? Who cares if you have cobwebs on the high parts of your ceilings?
If you do want to quickly clean, I wrote about a method here, Reduce Stress with this Single Chore. It’s a panic-free way to prepare for any surprises.
It’s time to be real because that’s how we all live. Most people hire a cleaning service to get their home looking 5-star, but they are not living that way on a daily basis. If they are, they can afford it. But those of us who can’t, let’s stop trying to be more than we are. It doesn’t bring our guests comfort, and it most certainly shows us that we are afraid of what people think. You’re not gross. You’re human. Keep a home that looks lived in and be respectful enough when you do clean. It’s the only way to bring a guest vitality, whereas a sterile home makes us feel lifeless.
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